I am finally back home..
The days that i have been waiting for since going there had finally come, and i m living the days...
n 22nd happened..siri pertama ekspidisi bahagia..
=)

oh.god.

I know this is too much from me,but i SERIOUSLY cannot wait for exams to be over n GO HOME.

I can't wait for the moment i can finally take out my big bag n start packing,can wait for the moment when i hop home n c SS n shout to SS that i FINISH MY EXAMS ALREADY!!!!seriously seriously cannot wait anymore!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!yohhhhhh...

i m going to burst soon,real soon..i must learn to calm down,n STUDYYY!!!

OH MY GOD..
i seriously cannot WAIT anymore!!!
twelve more days is like FOREVER...
just be fast time, be fast..exam be over fast..n i WANT TO FLY BACK HOME..
I want to GO HOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!GO BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

june is here but

Its JUNE, but the day is not here yet...
n now its so near yet so far..
maybe i m too tired from the excitement, and with all the exams coming before the day.
the day i have been waiting since i land.
Its not that i am not excited anymore, i am still excited and i m sure i will be super excited when the day comes,but maybe for the time being its just too much.
But don't hope for too much.

I've been having this mixed feelings recently, i don't know what it is.
I m too numb to even know what feeling am i having.
I have been sleeping too much.
Half of year had passed,n c how time flies.
But yet, another three weeks is like forever..omg..
Half a year, six months, about twenty four months or more had passed but another three weeks till the day is like forever...
or is it just me?

I can't wait..
can't wait..
cannot wait..
cannot wait, for exams to b over.
cannot wait to go home..
Omg Omg Omg..
Theres so many things on my mind right now.

3113

Its raining...
Its cold...
n i better get to sleep and wake up early and do some work.

everybody needs a little time away...
from each other..
far away from each other..
hold me now..
its hard to say i m sorry..
i just want you to stay..
After all that we've been through..
I will make it up to u,i promise you..
After all that had been said and done..
You're just the part of me that i can't let go..

*So random n so happen that i was listening to this song.

tired.

I m tired of thinking..
My thoughts is tiring me.
Tired of creating an issue for myself to think n think n think..
Thinking consume a lot of energy,i m exhausted but still i cannot sleep.
When i go to bed at nite,no matter how tired my brain is,it takes me a while to fall asleep.
Its no more like last time,when i just see my bed n drop dead,i slept like a log..
The thinking continues till i sleep,the thinking is now bothering my sleep..
I am mentally tired,really tired..
I just want to put a stop to all the thinking, but i cannot.
I keep on telling myself not to think anymore, but the thoughts keeep on coming, keep on pouring into my brain till its flooded with thoughts that i made myself to think when,its like i do not want to think anymore,i m tired but i cannot control my thoughts n i kept on thinking n then telling myself that i am really tired n i really need to stop all this.Put a FULL STOP to all of this.

Count how many tired i used in this,n u will know how really TIRED am i to all this,but i keep on thinking..

monday morning

I was very hyper yesterday,n now i feel like shit..
I can feel that heavy stone on my chest again...what is happening?
I hope not again...

Will i be able to let go?
Its a lie if i say i can or i dunno,cause deep down inside i know i can't.
Letting go is the hardest thing for me, n i duno you or her or him or she or he, but for me i think i rather die then to let go..
But still one day i will have to learn to let go as it is a part of life.
Letting go of everything is hard to me...
Letting go of things i had in possession before, n that is why i have alot of rubbish in my room.
Even stationery is hard for me to throw, n thus i have alot of pens pencils laying around.
Even letting go of a place that i have stay for a few days n when i had to leave it would be hard for me,depends on where la,since young i m like that.
Letting go of incidents that occurred, about that i m a person that can just live in beautiful memory of the past,but of course there are bitter ones that i do not want to think of. But not everything in life is beautiful.
The hardest was of course to be letting go of a person.
The more i m attached to a person, the harder it would be,that is just common sense.
Even i m a bit attached to a person,it would be hard for me.
This is the hardest thing on earth to do man, will take forever for me to finally let go or when i die?

nothing else.

Today is 11/5.
One month plus n i will b on my way flying home..home..home..
N of course i can't wait..i can't wait to meet everyone back home..
Can't wait for the foods and of course can't wait for ekspidisi bahagia!!!
I just want to get everything over n finish with this semester, pack n go back home!!!

wee........